Free Funny Text Messages

• Hey brat you coming out tonight? Or gonna play with your Barbie?

• Let's go to the comedy club. A really funny person other than me will be there!

You forgot to call someone

• No one ever gets my messages. I have the habit of leaving them before the beep.

• Sorry I didn't call. I was too lazy to talk.

Want to borrow a car off the friend

• Hey name, can I borrow your car? I'm going to Vancouver & don't want to waste the kilometers on mine.

• Since the roads are dangerous, I'll use your car. I prefer to crash yours instead of mine!

State what you want to do

• I'm bored. Lets go play badminton on your bed.

• Let's go to the mall so you can buy me something!

Mentioning some interesting facts

• I gotta tell you before it's too late. Your zipper is down.

• Did you know a person without clothes is considered nude?

• There's a booger hanging out of your nose.

• My girlfriend has twins. Both are found on her chest.

• You just stepped in dog poo.

• I'm on a rush to beat rush hour!

• Someone told me sex is popular. I think he lied.

Totally random

• Send me a text message or get spanked!

• I’m sending you a text message cause I want a reply!

Someone says Happy New Years after new years.

• Happy delayed new years to you too!

• Happy new years to me, 3 days too late!

• A bit too slow. Too much alcohol I assume.